It's Not About Me.

It was a disappoint to hear that my only hope for getting into nursing school has expressed their regret for allowing me to be one of their nursing students. That put a damper on m day, but that’s alright. Most people would instantly grovel, complain, and gripe about such rejection. I had a different reaction. Don’t get me wrong, I was very disappointed, but my heart felt something else. I felt peace. Peace to know that there is something bigger for me that my Father has planned. My husband was telling me that perhaps I am not meant to be a nurse. You see, I failed out of my nursing program, and since then, I’ve been waiting for a nursing school to accept me. This certain college that expressed their regret was, in an essence, my only hope.

But then, I began to think...

It’s not about me, it’s not about my parents, and it’s not about my husband. It’s about how the Lord will be using me. I am His. I am to be used for his glory, not because of the talents I have, but because He is using me for His glory. That is what it’s all about. All throughout the years, I’ve been wanting to please my parents and other people. It doesn’t go that way. That’s not how the Lord works. When and where will he be using me? That’s the question.

….so, what now you ask? I’ll let you know once the Lord tells me. That means spending more time in prayer and asking the Lord, “Lord, how do you intend on using me? What do you want me to do? Where do you want me to go?”

The classes that I am currently taking is no accident. Maybe the Lord is teaching me to be serious in these classes that I am taking, even if they are not as difficult as the courses I have taken before...

Lessons, lessons, lessons. What else is the Lord teaching me?

I am not discouraged, nor I am giving up hope. I must also remember to be thankful for a husband who is there to support me, to encourage me, to be there for me, and to take care of me-my heart longs to do the same for him, but I suppose this is not the appropriate time. It’s all about the Lord’s timing.