A Second Farewell

Having to part with my husband the second time around did not come any easier. I now understand what it means to never let go, to live within the moment, and to cherish every single minute that you have with them. Only memories of the wonderful time he and I made are ingrained in my mind. Though I am still sulking because of his departure and absence, I remember what our Pastor told us. The Lord came here to give us life. It is not goodbye, only a see you later. Life is a journey, and my husband's presence and him being here for two weeks is only a gift. He has a mission to do, and it must be done. He is like a Spartan, a soldier, sent out to protect our land. Because I know that this is only a journey, I smile at the memories that we made and I thank the Lord for those memories and the time that He has enabled for the both of us to enjoy dearly.


I missed him so much that I dare not touch the pile of clothes that he left behind, the shoes and slippers he wore throughout the duration of the trip, his cologne, the last silverware and cup he used,the half empty water bottles near the lamp stand,the teddy bears he won for me at a carnival, and especially refusing to wash the bedsheets he slept in. I had no one to hug so I used two extra pillows and pretended it was him. I know it was lame, but I guess this is what it really feels like to miss someone.

It's only been a day since he's been gone and en-route back to that desert land, but wow do I dearly miss him. It aches my dear heart. This journey has been tough, but I know that the Lord strengthens me daily. I know that heaven feels this sorrow that he and I feel. I know that the Lord himself understands what we are going through. I just have to keep reminding myself that there is a God bigger and greater that can fully handle what we are going through. All we have to do is to cast this burden upon him.

Every time I hear the planes roaring above the sky, I think of yesterday and play out that last day we hugged and kissed each other, that day when I stayed to watch his plane lift off into the sky until I could no longer see it in plain sight. That day when I drove home alone without my loved one beside me. That day when I slept by myself without him by my side.

Through it all, I have begun to realize the deep love I have for him, how I miss him, and how I've cherished the moments we had together. Having to function and to go about the normal business of life is not at all easy. It was as if he was only here yesterday, waking up next to me, giving me that good morning kiss.

I know that we will be fine, and he will come home again-this time with a grand welcome.

His first departure was different than the second. I suppose it was because that I was able to find out more about my husband and began to love him more and more. I shared lots of laugh and love and memories. I knew more about his likes and dislikes, his personality, and the fact that we are alike in many ways.

On that side note...I found this quote from somebody in facebook: "If you can't do it in front of your mama or Jesus, then don't do it at all." Speaking of facebook, it has become mundane. Rather, I just use it to write to my husband.

After spending an entire two weeks with my husband away from internet, he and I found more meaningful things to do instead of delving oneself in front of the computer all day long. We created memories.